aka: GO FUCK YOURSELF. That’s what hard boiling an egg should be titled. “GO FUCK YOURSELF.” Because, essentially, you’re the egg’s little bitch. Never in my life has one simple cooking excursion demanded so much time and energy. So much attention to detail. So much…EGG. See, to properly boil an egg, these are the instructions [...]
So I’m at my parents house before heading out, just saying hello. Well, been here for about 3 hours. So I thought “I should shower here, before I subject the general populace to the quaint aroma of freshly cut onions, and cologne. I’m in the shower, looking for the shampoo, and I see one bottle [...]
There’s starving children everywhere, just ask Bono. There’s wars and conflict all around the world, just ask Bill Clinton. There’s suffering in regions we don’t even know about, just ask Sally Struthers. So who the FUCK asked this guy- To be in the finals on celebrity Jeopardy!?!? Ok, I know the questions are kind of [...]
These lyrics blow. Or are they beautiful? I’m not entirely too sure. I’ll find myself hating the very existence of this new song by Usher and Will.I.Am, and the next moment, I’ll be rocking out in my Hyundai, like a crazy man. A crazy man who has a theory about time travel, but NO ONE [...]
Oh, hallo everyone, how are you? I’m good, thank you for asking! How was your day? Mine was ok. I got to talk to people, and do work, and eat a sandwich, what more can you ask for? A laser that’s also a dinosaur? Ok, you got me there pal! PUT IT THERE! *shakes hands [...]