Hervatski.com – A little bit of everything. And Unicorn.

And I know I have to get the last peanut butter blog post out before January is over.  A long, memorable, sad, happy, January.  I know no one really reads this website other than Sonia and Nancy, which they SHOULDN’T at work, but whatever.  Anywho, I know they only read it but one day in the future, perhaps 8 people will read it.   Regardless of the amount of people that read it, I’ve made a decision to dedicate a part of my life to building this horrifying place, and damnit, that’s what I’m gonna do.

So to finish this month in peanut butter off, I gotta get my emo out.  Not like my emu, which wasn’t let out, as much as it escaped and was shot by the huntington beach hillbillies that live nearby.

The point of this whole God forsaken post is, one of my last duties in my weight loss/maintaining odyssey was to get to a point where I could control my portions.  Control them when I didn’t buffer them with other activities.

For example.  If I wake up on saturday, and have some cereal, I’ll have a small sandwich at lunch.  Based upon what I did between lunch and dinner, I might not eat a lot.  Correction.  If it’s good food, I might go nuts, and that’s bad.  That’s “old habits” John.  That’s “expose yourself in front of them puerto ricans” John.  I don’t like those Johns.

BUT, if I wake up, have my cereal, have my small sandwich, then work out?  The sky’s the limit.  I’ve built up enough muscles that I can eat well, if I work out.  Gotta watch it now.  I’m turning 30 and my superpowers are coming shortly.

Now, the trick is, if I know I’m not going to work out, and I might meet up with friends, I’ll snack on something before I go out, and just not eat.  If I know I’m not working out and I’m staying in, that’s easy, I can force myself to make something simple.

The trick is when you make something delicious, and you didn’t work out, but you didn’t eat much that day, and you’re STARVING.  You know what you’re eating is enough calories.  You KNOW it, but you can’t get ENOUGH of it!

Today was that special day.  I ate a banana and peanut butter, walked a little bit, and I made dinner.  I made this:

You’re thinking, “Ewww what is THAT!”

That my friends, is home made spaghetti sauce, with craft mac and cheese.  Along with, melted jalapeno jack cheese.  Quite simply, the ultimate comfort food for a man child.

And you’re thinking, “So what, JOHN, what’s your stupid point?!”

My point is, I ate a bowl of this stuff, loved it, and was still hungry.  But knowing the calories in it, I still went back to the stove, to dump the rest (The stuff you see above) into the bowl and eat it.  I did dump it.  I took one fork of it, then sighed, placed foil on top, and it’s sitting in my fridge now.

So what’s the point?  The point is, there was a very special person who helped me out greatly in my last leg of weight loss.  With her help, I lost about 35-40lbs.  With her help, I changed a lot of my ways, and became more dedicated than ever.  More dedicated to stay “Skinnier John” and “confident John.”  And I’ll continue to carry her help around me for as long as I can, no matter where she is.

It’s because of her that I’m sitting here not full, not hungry, but proud.  Proud that I have it in me to succeed.  Perhaps I’ll spin that around to other aspects of my life, perhaps not.  But no matter what happens, this victory this evening…this night…belongs to her.  As cheesy and as weird as it sounds to be equated to spaghetti mac and cheese.

So in all, I’ll just say…Thank you.  There might be more emo posts in the future, but lets hope they’re devoid of sadness