Hervatski.com – A little bit of everything. And Unicorn.

IMPOSSIBLE!!!!

I had peanut butter for breakfast AND a peanut butter milkshake during dinner!  Can you call that heaven?  Can you call a Jewish guy on saturday?  I’m not sure, can you?  I’m not Jewish, nor am I black, but I got funk AND soul.

Anywho, what do we have today?

Fuck.

I mean, uuuuu yum!  Yes the banana is as delicious as it looks.  By delicious, I mean it tastes like Satan’s anus.  Don’t know what that tastes like?  You’ve never lost a game of H.O.R.S.E?

“Over the head spinning alley-oop!  And if you miss this, you have to taste my anus.”
“Away from me, Satan!  Also, give me the BALL, Satan!”

The banana’s were not ripe, or they were cursed, one or the other, because they tasted like ASS.  And we all know what goes perfect on ass, right?

Shit.

Shit goes on ass.  And THIS….looks like SHIT.

Fucking organic chunky peanut butter.  I see this same image 8 hours later while sitting on the toilet.  I also see it when I close my eyes in a crowded mall, but that’s between me and my doctor.

What part of this image does NOT look like a clown took a dump on this plate?  It’s all swirly and stuff.  Want a closer look?

Fuck you organic shit.  There’s a reason why we live longer, know what it is?  CHEMICALS.  We developed CHEMICALS and they cure EVERYTHING!  Chemicals make old people OLDER and hot chicks HOTTER.  Chemicals can DO no wrong!  They make Jiff taste like fresh roasted AWESOME while the LACK of chemicals make my peanut butter look like DO DO!

DO DO!

Makes you hungry doesn’t it?  What kind of SICK fuck are you!?

I’m done for today with this peanut butter garbage.  Thank GOD I have like 6 bananas left to eat for the week, or else I’d get scared that a moment would pass where I don’t down stuff that looks the same coming out.

I ain’t rating this shit again.  Fuck you.  This time I’m giving it an overall score of:

1 mark-twain-as-an-angel-devil-on-a-cloud-reading

Thank you.